"Thanksgiving Day is a day devoted by persons with inflammatory rheumatism to thanking a loving Father that it is not hydrophobia."

"Any member introducing a dog into the Society's premises shall be liable to a fine of one pound. Any animal leading a blind person shall be deemed to be a cat."

"Those who say truth is stranger than fiction have wasted their time on poorly written fiction."

"Unfortunately, money is freedom in today's world."

"Nietzche started a nonsensical idea that men had once sought as good what we now call evil; if it were so, we could not talk of surpassing or even falling short of them."

"A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won't cross the street to vote in a national election."

"Condemn none: if you can stretch out a helping hand, do so. If you cannot, fold your hands, bless your brothers, and let them go their own way."

"Come out into the universe of Light. Everything in the universe is yours, stretch out your arms and embrace it with love. If you every felt you wanted to do that, you have felt God."

"They reel to and fro, and stagger like a drunken man, and are at their wit's end."

"Cleverness is like a lens with a very sharp focus. Wisdom is more like a wide-angle lens."